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  1.  
    John Cleese: bum knee, anxious knee surgery, has to use harley, doctor prescribed British blonde.

    mrsthing: back, tooth, root canal where long root discovered all the way to her right toe, no sleep. Recent virus.

    English Cad: Off the crack, and on the Meth

    Fanny: back injury, in tacky back brace, pub accident involving lower bowels

    Chris: Totally gone AWOL

    Lozzy: She seems unusually chipper.

    Pink: Never sobered up.

    Naughty: Same as pink, and happened in same pub.

    Wm C Elliot: Motorcycle wreck/dimensional issues
  2.  
    cough: needs syrup

    Dean: Writer's Cramp

    Val: developed Jack Cheese multiple personality disorder.

    Zelda: Cajunitis.
    •  
      CommentAuthorLozzykinz
    • CommentTimeJun 24th 2010 edited
     
    Chipper? Isn't that a fish and chip shop?

    You forgot to mention hypochondriac
  3.  
    Hypochondriac...

    Val: Val: developed Jack Cheese multiple personality disorder. and pickiness (lol, if I had to be corrected every time I make a mistake you all would not have rest. "Val, that's incorrect!" "Val, that verb is not reflexive" etc etc.)

    Anyway, Fanny, you're absolutely right. This is no longer a forum, it turned into a nursing home hahahaha!
  4.  
    Fanny - serious about the back brace? I'm sorry to hear!


    umm
    *hic*
    •  
      CommentAuthorLozzykinz
    • CommentTimeJun 24th 2010
     
    val, that's what i said
  5.  
    Nah, nah, don't try to cheat me, it was "hypercondriac" before. You've edited it! :P
    • CommentAuthorzelda
    • CommentTimeJun 24th 2010
     
    Although she loves them, Zelda is not Cajun. She does, however have a severe case of "What thu"!!!
    Get better girls...
    •  
      CommentAuthorPaute
    • CommentTimeJun 24th 2010
     
    And CPDolly?
  6.  
    Paute, my apologies.
    •  
      CommentAuthorWmCElliott
    • CommentTimeJun 25th 2010 edited
     
    I can't actually claim my dimensional tunneling as a physical complaint, as the effect of the tunneling is to transport my consciousness to another parallel universe where I survive something that would've killed me in the previous universe.

    I do, however, take several medications, mainly to allow me to interact with coworkers without "snapping", which, strictly speaking, is more for *their* health and longevity than for mine.

    The only real malady that I suffer from is Barrett's Esophagus (spelled ridiculously in Britain).
  7.  
    Naughty, stop drooling on me.
    • CommentAuthormrsthing
    • CommentTimeJun 25th 2010
     
    Toof all better now.
    • CommentAuthorzelda
    • CommentTimeJun 25th 2010
     
    Bunny is vomiting all over her front porch...Poor Bunny. Bring her some Compazine!
  8.  
    ?
    • CommentAuthorzelda
    • CommentTimeJun 25th 2010
     
    Compazine is for nausia and vomiting and Bunny dislikes vomit.
  9.  
    Umm, Pink - that's not me... :shocked:
  10.  
    Oh ew....
    Can someone add to the list that one of my personalities has developed a rather disgusting drooling habit?
  11.  
    I refuse to vomit!

    *puffs out cheeks in defiance*

    However, pray for the itchiness in the panties!! :cry::shamed:
  12.  
    I've got a headache, a terrible one. :confused:
  13.  
    I'm drunk as a mooncalf, whatever it means.
    • CommentAuthorzelda
    • CommentTimeJun 25th 2010
     
    what calls the itchiness, Bunny?
  14.  
    vale, happy to see you off the path of perdition...
  15.  
    Thank you, saint Apollonia. If colloidal silver won't work, please listen to Mrs T prayers. You are the patron saint of dentists and of those who suffer from toothache, aren't you? :fingersear:
  16.  
    i'm not a saint and i'm not apollonia. i never played with whosoever was formerly known as prince.
    • CommentAuthormrsthing
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2010
     
    I'm a Methodist. We don't pray to saints.
    • CommentAuthorzelda
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2010
     
    That is the problem with Methodists...No support groups!:hungry:
  17.  
    LOL Zelda!

    Mrs T, when I happen to have a toothache I beg even Ganesh. :wink:
    •  
      CommentAuthorLozzykinz
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2010
     
    I got so drunk last night.
    •  
      CommentAuthorLozzykinz
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2010
     
    Fanny, why did you edit your first post?

    T'was funny...
  18.  
    Because I didn't put those fucking stupid smiley winkey things beside everything so everyone would know that it was meant in a fucking nice way. So I'm just trying to be fucking nice now by removing offensive things that could be musunderstood, or are fucking stereotypes, or oh hell, anything written by me, you know, because I'm such a fucking self-centered writer who doesn't give other people credit. THAT'S fucking why? Any more fucking questions?
  19.  
    But I don't have time to fucking answer them, because it's Saturday and I'm waiting for the yardsale to open down the street. But thank you for saying it was funny. That was very nice of you, vous. (instead of saying boo, like people say now as screet language, I'm changing the boo to vous, so they may learn some French, what little knowledge in that field I could give them. Oops! Okay, yard sale almost set up! Gotta go!
    •  
      CommentAuthorLozzykinz
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2010
     
    :shocked:
    • CommentAuthorzelda
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2010
     
    Vous is the formal "you" in French. Is that the secret word?:cool:
    •  
      CommentAuthorWmCElliott
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2010
     
    Sounds like you're on the right (i.e., correct) side of the Sabine River, Zelda.

    N'est pas?
    • CommentAuthormrsthing
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2010
     
    Oh, don't start worrying about offending people, or it won't be any fun around here anymore. We can straighten things out without a huge bru-ha-ha.
    •  
      CommentAuthorLozzykinz
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2010
     
    Comedy isn't funny if it doesn't involve offending someone or something :-P
  20.  
    N'est-ce pas? ;)
  21.  
    I don't think we have any Nespa, sir. Just Hershey's. :shades:
  22.  
    "Murder by Death!" I LOVE YOU! :rainbow:
    •  
      CommentAuthorWmCElliott
    • CommentTimeJun 26th 2010 edited
     
    That was the right way of saying it in the *previous* parallel universe.
    • CommentAuthorzelda
    • CommentTimeJun 27th 2010
     
    Je t'adore, au chocolote. *Gobbles down Hershey's almond bar.
  23.  
    I agree with Mrs. Thing, Fann, and honestly I hadn't noticed you writing anything offensive lately, if at all. It can all be straightened out anyway. You shouldn't feel restricted or censored. That's the whole point of a free forum.
    • CommentAuthorzelda
    • CommentTimeJun 27th 2010
     
    I do not know what you said Fan... who said you were insulting? thought this was funny thread. BruHaHa's are honest and funny, MT.
    •  
      CommentAuthorLozzykinz
    • CommentTimeJun 27th 2010
     
    zelda, she's talking about things that were said in another thread...
    •  
      CommentAuthorchris14
    • CommentTimeJun 27th 2010
     
    I'm sick (of the World Cup) right now.
    •  
      CommentAuthorWmCElliott
    • CommentTimeJun 27th 2010
     
    OK, this is what I'm talking about.

    I just got dressed and went to work, finding the parking lot totally empty.

    I was certain that yesterday was Sunday, which, ordinarily, would make today Monday.

    On returning home, I noticed a small, roundish rock in my driveway, and it has no obvious source, but it's dark and heavy, much like meteorites I've seen.

    So, either I mistook Saturday for Saturday *AND* Sunday, or something stranger happened.

    Like maybe my house got hit with a much larger meteorite in the prior parallel universe, and I was killed and there's a crater where my house was.

    Since I *do* believe in God, it could've been a miracle as easily as me tunneling to a more "Nerf-ish" universe, but in this instance, I suspect He did it to save my kitties, who are a lot cuter than I am and He probably likes a lot more. Couldn't blame Him, they don't cuss or engage in premarital sex (or generate theories about how the universe was formed, as if *I* could understand the process even if it wasn't a pure miracle).

    Somewhere in the orbital/quantum mechanics of replacing the big rock with the little one, I gained another Sunday (for which I'm *also* grateful).

    It couldn't be my memory going bad, I had mustard on my cheeseburger yesterday, and have been taking Resveratrol on a daily basis for some time now.

    I just wonder what *else* is different in this universe.
  24.  
    Or, you know, maybe, you.. got mixed up.
  25.  
    :wink:
    •  
      CommentAuthorWmCElliott
    • CommentTimeJun 27th 2010
     
    You mean, *confused*? About the number of days in a weekend!?!

    I supposed it's a *possibility*, but I think it's more likely that I got vaporized by an asteroid and tunneled to (yet another) parallel universe.

    At this rate, by the time I reach retirement age, the whole Earth will be made of soft, pastel-colored Styrofoam.