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Notice: Undefined index: l2e153192 in /var/sites/c/cleeseblog.com/public_html/Vanilla/extensions/UserAward/conf/language.php on line 1 The Spanking New John Cleese Forum - All DiscussionsTue, 28 Jun 2016 06:57:51 +0100
Lussumo Vanilla 1.1.4Welcome all new Cheeselets
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1Thu, 10 Jan 2008 11:41:06 +0000jackcheeseHow to post pictures, links, and quotes and do some text effects
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=578Sun, 07 Jun 2009 23:53:31 +0100mrsthing Copy the URL of the photo you want to paste. JPGs work well, GIFs are iffy. Paste the URL in a comments box on the forum. Put <img src=" before the URL and "></img> after. No spaces between the URL and the quotation marks. Tick or click on the Html button below the box in which you enter your comments. Submit
If the picture doesn't have a URL, upload it to something like Photobucket, and get the URL from there. To embed a picture, it has to have a URL.
If the picture doesn't print, check to make sure you coded it properly. Extra spaces, missing spaces, incorrect or missing or extra characters--all these cause failure.
Copy and paste the URL of the item you want to link. Type <a href=" before the URL and ">TEXT</a> after. Where it says "TEXT" here, type the name you want for the link. It can be as long or as short as you like. Tick or click on the Html button below the box in which you enter your comments. Submit
If you add 'target="_blank"' in the html link code it'll open a new window, instead of taking over your beloved cleeseblog window! (At least, it works that way in Internet Explorer!)
that is, Type target="_blank" href=" before the URL and ">TEXT after.
If it doesn't work, check to make sure you typed the whole thing correctly.
***To insert a quote:
Copy and paste the text you want to appear in the quote box. You have to enter some hard returns (press the enter key) or the text will come out in one long line, merrily traveling outside the box and possibly off the page. Type <code> before it and </code> after it. Finish your post. Tick or click on the Html button below the box in which you enter your comments. Submit.
In order to embed a video, you have to have an unidentified button between the Text and Html buttons. I get this in Safari, but not in Firefox. If you don't have three buttons below the comments box, try another browser. If that doesn't work, you'll have to post a link instead.
***For text effects:
Italics are <i>text</i> Bold is <b>text</b> Underline is <u>text</u> Strikethrough is <s>text</s>
Click on Vanillacons just above the "submit" button. There are 5 separate categories of emoticons, but you can only display one at a time.
***To insert "fill in the blank" text boxes: <form name="input" action="http://whatever.you.want" method="get"> Your feedback is important to us!: <input type="text" /> <input type="submit" value="Just kidding" /> </form>
***To insert check boxes: <form> Your Text Here: <input type="checkbox" /> </form>]]>
Signing Up To This Forum: The New User Policy
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=893Wed, 07 Oct 2009 14:41:12 +0100D
New forum applications are vetted.
This is because the old forum became spammy. Therefore, if you have a dodgy-looking email address, or if you make multiple requests, or if you request an inconsistent or suspicious user name such as "iwillpunchyouinthefaceandstealyourwallet" or "IWantYourBabiesNow!" or some similarly annoying monicker, or, if your email address is email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org but your user name says "Rupert Bear" or "Miranda Freshcakes" chances are you won't be let in on the basis that you might be evil, and then we'd have to waste time removing you.
That's it! Have a nice day!]]>
About This Forum
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=645Tue, 23 Jun 2009 08:07:27 +0100D
The Spanking New John Cleese forum is offered "as is" with no guarantee of anything whatsoever.
Tolerance and respect = the policy. This forum is for grown ups. We expect a live-and-let-live attitude to prevail at all times. Banter is allowed. Flaming, trolling or abuse is not allowed.
Your continued use of this forum depends upon your being good, and we alone decide what is good. Bad behaviour, including posting spam, making nasty personal comments (including in private messages) or getting on too many people's nerves will result in membership being terminated.
NB: We reserve entirely the right to ban any member for any reason at any time.
Do not post things here which you do not want to be public. Or to put it another way, anything you post here will be public, show up in search engines, and might be republished elsewhere.
There is no technical or other support. It's totally up to members to navigate and make use of the forum. If you get confused, generally you will find that the (mostly) helpful members will assist you.
These bare-bones terms may be arbitrarily amended at any time and your continuing use of this forum indicates your acceptance of them.
Why did it all have to stop?
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2059Tue, 29 Jan 2013 10:21:47 +0000jackcheese It just had to return, it had to open its doors once more and not go the way of all community spaces and become a themed restaurant with a measly wine list and petit-bourgeois menus. Back come the pies, the crisps and the peanuts, the warm beer and the farts of the old dog by the fire.]]>
Do any of you use this forum yet? Apparently, John seems to visit it sometimes
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2064Sat, 20 Sep 2014 00:47:17 +0100chris14To Whomever: Please stop deleting my threads
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2063Mon, 30 Sep 2013 19:03:15 +0100mrsthing Someone closed and sank my threads posting links to the new forum, so I posted two more threads with the links on Sunday, September 29, 2013. As of 2pm EDT on September 30, they're gone.
We like the new forum. New members can join, and two members are admins. It solved two big problems that this forum had.]]>
It is a miracle! The Parrot is alive!!!!!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1993Fri, 11 Nov 2011 23:49:13 +0000zeldaFantastic show, wonderful company and a very kind gesture.
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1786Sat, 18 Jun 2011 18:27:32 +0100englishcad The second half of the show an absolute delight. The Audience loving every second. After the show the forum members all gathered in the down stairs bar, to wait for the great man to appear... Turkish was on top form, making everyone laugh. This helping to keep nerves at bay. Some of the ladies started to get a little tongue tied, as John strolled towards us. Cad is far to much of a gentleman to mention names, Mrsthing, CP no one ever need know. John was great, instantly putting everyone at their ease. This despite being tired from putting his heart and soul into his brilliant performance. He posed for pictures, signed everything that was put in front of him, including Zelda! Answering a myriad of questions... He spent the best part of half an hour with us. Dazzling the lovely Kisch with his Russian. Val and her super boyfriend with his Italian. Some fantastic photos and video were taken. Mrsthings smile reaching from ear to ear, she even broke into song as we left the theather... Cad is sure everyone will post their accounts, these being just some of the things Cad was lucky enough to witness. What a great bunch of people. Cad wishes to thank each and everyone of you for such a delightful evening.
John and Garry what a lovely gesture, thank you both, you made a great evening perfect!]]>
Grand Opening of Lewis' Pub
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1419Thu, 17 Jun 2010 01:26:41 +0100The InquisitorMISSING: Zelda and Foote
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2055Wed, 07 Mar 2012 01:14:38 +0000mrsthing We're all at the new forum, Sis Z. I hope we'll see you there soon!]]>
A THREAD FOR WRITERS, POETS, POET LAUREATS, ARTISTS, ETC...
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=400Sat, 31 Jan 2009 01:45:27 +0000chris14 We can write about our own written materials, we can post our own written materials. Well, because of the limited (or unlimited??????!!!!!! I've never tried this frame's limits) space, poems are more likely to be posted. But if the space lets us, we can write anything. I think this forum's safe enough, and copyrighted, perhaps, although I'm not sure about this, but we can be each others' witnesses, in case if something happens.]]>
The Non-Sequitur Thread
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=733Fri, 24 Jul 2009 07:58:27 +0100mrsthing Don't answer anyone's comments in this thread.
Don't go all passive agressive and start a conversation. It's just a game.
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2058Mon, 26 Nov 2012 22:53:57 +0000biggalallaFINALLY: A FORUM YOU CAN USE! (Hint: it's not this one--see first post for details!)
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2053Thu, 01 Mar 2012 19:08:26 +0000mrsthing
HERE to get started. We're looking forward to seeing you! Or, just use this one. It's actually more fun.]]>
Towel Day / Python surprise
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2057Fri, 25 May 2012 12:43:57 +0100Spiny Norman
THE NEW FORUM IS UP AND RUNNING ON JOHN'S NEW SITE!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2052Mon, 27 Feb 2012 18:51:02 +0000mrsthing
THE NEW FORUM IS UP AND RUNNING!
Just go to John's New Forum and create an account for yourself. All you new members who have been so patiently waiting--you can post on the new forum! And all of us regulars can, too. So come on over!
Don't forget: John cannot visit this forum. But he might visit the new one.]]>
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2051Thu, 23 Feb 2012 00:09:12 +0000chris14 The problem was that our dearest of the dearests John forgot to mention that it wouldn't be held in a book store that I'd imagined.
I've got a meeting at the Covent Garden which isn't too far away from the place where the presentation was, but I couldn't manage to arrive earlier therefore I was late an hour. This is embarrassing itself, but I thought I'd hide away somewhere deep inside in the bookshop or in a corner not to bother others.
My first shock was when I entered, there was a guy who accepted the guests. I told him what I wanted and I knew I was late, he said not to worry, just go upstairs, 5th floor. The second shock was when stepping out of the elevator there was a reception-desk, with a guy and a girl, asking me where I was heading to. It was already very suspicious, I already thought it wouldn't be just a simple book-signing in a bookshop. And when at least 2 or 3 girls accompanied me further inside, I started panicking.
In the room, everyone was properly dressed (I was soaked a bit from the tiny rain all afternoon, arrived just from the street in street-wear) so I felt extremely embarrassed. But everybody was nice and unnerving, tried to make me feel better. I talked to the most of them, including the author (she signed a copy of her book for me).
And there was someone who looked exactly like John's girlfriend, Jenny... I talked to her as well, but I guess she's in Australia with John... So, she either wasn't Jenny, or she's not in Australia with him.
The book seems interesting, the author explained that it's a bit like Harry Potter with mythological characters (from the Greek Mythology). John had already mentioned this book a couple of months ago, it must be very good. I'm looking forward to reading it, I'll let you know what my opinion is when I'm ready.]]>
PROBLEMS SIGNING UP ON THE NEW FORUM?
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2054Fri, 02 Mar 2012 15:39:54 +0000mrsthing
John's new home page.
Click on the "Forum" link at the bottom of the page.
On the right hand side of the page, click on the "Apply for Membership" button.
Fill in the fields, and click on the "Sign up" button.
If that doesn't work, let Lozzy or me know here or on Facebook, and we'll see what we can do.]]>
John Cleese Carefully Considers Your Futile Comments:
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2049Sun, 19 Feb 2012 21:40:45 +0000Paute
Hello, I'm Michael Palin...]]>
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2048Fri, 17 Feb 2012 02:52:34 +0000kumbaya I give you...my very own local, from downtown East Grinstead...the renowned
Gargoyle and Spigot.
Anybody else got a favorite local? i have a few more ;)]]>
WELCOM JOHN CHESE TO YOUR BIRTHDAY PARTY BY YOUR FORUMITES
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1983Thu, 27 Oct 2011 19:54:55 +0100zelda WE WILL BE COMING AT DIFFERENT TIMES WAITING FOR THE GREAT ONE, BUT FIRST A FIEW EPISODES FROM JOHN'S DEEVELOPMENTAL YEARS. FIRST IS MRSTHING HIS FIRST FAN AND GROUPY WHO HAS FOLLOWED HIM FOR AT LEAST 50 YEARS.
TELL US MRSTHING WHAT ORIGINALLY ATTRACTED YOU TO MR. CHEESE, ER CLEESE?]]>
Tell me your problems. Your personal Mental Dustbin
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2041Sun, 22 Jan 2012 07:18:57 +0000chris14Word Association
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1244Tue, 06 Apr 2010 10:14:34 +0100Valetudinaria
The first word is "Torquay". No rules, just say what the word reminds you of. We can amuse ourselves by playing to the amateurish psychoanalyst, at least. (E.g. "Lozzy, I said 'chocolate' and you replied 'shit'. Is there something you would like to talk about?")
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1995Sun, 13 Nov 2011 04:35:10 +0000zeldaCOMING SOON TO A COMPUTER NEAR YOU!!!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2050Wed, 22 Feb 2012 13:35:26 +0000mrsthing I've had a sneak peek, and it seems really great. Features I like:
1. NO MORE HTML!!! :cheer::crazy::cheer::crazy::jumping: The comment box has a menu bar above it, similar to a Gmail comment box, so you can edit without having to remember all that stuff about angle brackets and nesting and making sure the characters are just so. I haven't tried inserting images or video yet.
2. WE CAN STILL SAY FUCK! And shit, damn, goddamn, fucking, motherfucker, cocksucker, tits, and any other naughty word you can think of. That was one thing I was adamant about when talking with the new admins.
3. WE WILL HAVE NEW MEMBERS! They'll be able to sign up and join. No that we don't have a nice little club here, but personally, I'd enjoy interacting with a few more people.
4. JOHN AND GARRY WILL BE ABLE TO VISIT!!! Due to rights issues pertaining to this forum, John and Garry cannot log on here. Ever. But they will be able to log on to the new forum. Whether they will or not remains to be seen, but at least they *can* now.
5. THIS FORUM IS NOT GOING AWAY!!! Again, due to rights issues, John can't take this forum down. I have no idea whether the owner/s of the rights to this forum will ever decide to take it down, or if they'll just leave it here. I don't know anything more about the problem than that.
We *will* have admins, two of them. Lozzy and I will be moderators. We will be able to ban people, but neither Lozzy nor I can imagine ever having to do that with any of the current members. That's mainly to get rid of spammers and trolls.
I don't know if you'll get an invite to the new forum from the admins, or if you'll just sign up. Lozzy and I will try to keep you posted.]]>
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1960Wed, 28 Sep 2011 18:40:11 +0100zelda I do not know about you, but, my life has been full of demands for perfection. Well, I am not perfect, shish, the good God did not make us that way and the Aliens did not seem too hot at it either. So then why do we have to be perfect. Not talking about this place but many places. It is a new world and my generation has certainly slugged loved and smoked and doped itself into embarrasement...well not just my generation and not me so personally, but it certainly is out there... So. I am throwing perfection into my mother's garbage can, telling all the psycho-pervs in my life to <drop themselves> cause I am SNARLY!
I went to a book signing in the big city last night. I was in a bad mood. I was with my lovely cousin and her mother-in-law who were oh so tolerant! I did not smile, I rolled my eyes, I butted in front of people, and complained about the seats till we got new ones. I sat down put my head on my hand and read my email. As this beautiful author discussed his book far up on stage, I had a running conversation with myself, wiggled in the seat, I shook my foot and was generally not myself. I was SNARLY. No one knew me, I didn't bother anyone and I really feel good about this accomplishment. So Twats and Twatlets. Does anyone feel SNARLY? Not b*tchy or witchy...just snarly?]]>
Spanking new Academy Awards
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2034Fri, 06 Jan 2012 07:19:04 +0000zeldaWild Gobblers attack Southern Mississippi!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2045Wed, 08 Feb 2012 20:49:02 +0000zelda
machines. 'It is a bewilderment", sajd the local sheriff. Dangest thing I ever did see."
*True storey I picked up on a local station while traveling through the area while on holidays. Didn't get whole story, but thought it funny considering our occasional comments on the State of Mississippi*]]>
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1909Tue, 16 Aug 2011 10:19:33 +0100zelda