Notice: Use of undefined constant UD_ADD_TAB - assumed 'UD_ADD_TAB' in /var/sites/c/cleeseblog.com/public_html/Vanilla/extensions/HotDiscussions/default.php on line 102 The Spanking New John Cleese Forum - All Discussions : Hot DiscussionsThu, 20 Jun 2013 06:18:35 +0100
Lussumo Vanilla 1.1.4Welcome all new Cheeselets
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1Thu, 10 Jan 2008 11:41:06 +0000jackcheeseHow to post pictures, links, and quotes and do some text effects
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=578Sun, 07 Jun 2009 23:53:31 +0100mrsthing Copy the URL of the photo you want to paste. JPGs work well, GIFs are iffy. Paste the URL in a comments box on the forum. Put <img src=" before the URL and "></img> after. No spaces between the URL and the quotation marks. Tick or click on the Html button below the box in which you enter your comments. Submit
If the picture doesn't have a URL, upload it to something like Photobucket, and get the URL from there. To embed a picture, it has to have a URL.
If the picture doesn't print, check to make sure you coded it properly. Extra spaces, missing spaces, incorrect or missing or extra characters--all these cause failure.
Copy and paste the URL of the item you want to link. Type <a href=" before the URL and ">TEXT</a> after. Where it says "TEXT" here, type the name you want for the link. It can be as long or as short as you like. Tick or click on the Html button below the box in which you enter your comments. Submit
If you add 'target="_blank"' in the html link code it'll open a new window, instead of taking over your beloved cleeseblog window! (At least, it works that way in Internet Explorer!)
that is, Type target="_blank" href=" before the URL and ">TEXT after.
If it doesn't work, check to make sure you typed the whole thing correctly.
***To insert a quote:
Copy and paste the text you want to appear in the quote box. You have to enter some hard returns (press the enter key) or the text will come out in one long line, merrily traveling outside the box and possibly off the page. Type <code> before it and </code> after it. Finish your post. Tick or click on the Html button below the box in which you enter your comments. Submit.
In order to embed a video, you have to have an unidentified button between the Text and Html buttons. I get this in Safari, but not in Firefox. If you don't have three buttons below the comments box, try another browser. If that doesn't work, you'll have to post a link instead.
***For text effects:
Italics are <i>text</i> Bold is <b>text</b> Underline is <u>text</u> Strikethrough is <s>text</s>
Click on Vanillacons just above the "submit" button. There are 5 separate categories of emoticons, but you can only display one at a time.
***To insert "fill in the blank" text boxes: <form name="input" action="http://whatever.you.want" method="get"> Your feedback is important to us!: <input type="text" /> <input type="submit" value="Just kidding" /> </form>
***To insert check boxes: <form> Your Text Here: <input type="checkbox" /> </form>]]>
A THREAD FOR WRITERS, POETS, POET LAUREATS, ARTISTS, ETC...
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=400Sat, 31 Jan 2009 01:45:27 +0000chris14 We can write about our own written materials, we can post our own written materials. Well, because of the limited (or unlimited??????!!!!!! I've never tried this frame's limits) space, poems are more likely to be posted. But if the space lets us, we can write anything. I think this forum's safe enough, and copyrighted, perhaps, although I'm not sure about this, but we can be each others' witnesses, in case if something happens.]]>
The Non-Sequitur Thread
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=733Fri, 24 Jul 2009 07:58:27 +0100mrsthing Don't answer anyone's comments in this thread.
Don't go all passive agressive and start a conversation. It's just a game.
It is a miracle! The Parrot is alive!!!!!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1993Fri, 11 Nov 2011 23:49:13 +0000zeldaFantastic show, wonderful company and a very kind gesture.
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1786Sat, 18 Jun 2011 18:27:32 +0100englishcad The second half of the show an absolute delight. The Audience loving every second. After the show the forum members all gathered in the down stairs bar, to wait for the great man to appear... Turkish was on top form, making everyone laugh. This helping to keep nerves at bay. Some of the ladies started to get a little tongue tied, as John strolled towards us. Cad is far to much of a gentleman to mention names, Mrsthing, CP no one ever need know. John was great, instantly putting everyone at their ease. This despite being tired from putting his heart and soul into his brilliant performance. He posed for pictures, signed everything that was put in front of him, including Zelda! Answering a myriad of questions... He spent the best part of half an hour with us. Dazzling the lovely Kisch with his Russian. Val and her super boyfriend with his Italian. Some fantastic photos and video were taken. Mrsthings smile reaching from ear to ear, she even broke into song as we left the theather... Cad is sure everyone will post their accounts, these being just some of the things Cad was lucky enough to witness. What a great bunch of people. Cad wishes to thank each and everyone of you for such a delightful evening.
John and Garry what a lovely gesture, thank you both, you made a great evening perfect!]]>
WELCOM JOHN CHESE TO YOUR BIRTHDAY PARTY BY YOUR FORUMITES
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1983Thu, 27 Oct 2011 19:54:55 +0100zelda WE WILL BE COMING AT DIFFERENT TIMES WAITING FOR THE GREAT ONE, BUT FIRST A FIEW EPISODES FROM JOHN'S DEEVELOPMENTAL YEARS. FIRST IS MRSTHING HIS FIRST FAN AND GROUPY WHO HAS FOLLOWED HIM FOR AT LEAST 50 YEARS.
TELL US MRSTHING WHAT ORIGINALLY ATTRACTED YOU TO MR. CHEESE, ER CLEESE?]]>
Tell me your problems. Your personal Mental Dustbin
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2041Sun, 22 Jan 2012 07:18:57 +0000chris14Word Association
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1244Tue, 06 Apr 2010 10:14:34 +0100Valetudinaria
The first word is "Torquay". No rules, just say what the word reminds you of. We can amuse ourselves by playing to the amateurish psychoanalyst, at least. (E.g. "Lozzy, I said 'chocolate' and you replied 'shit'. Is there something you would like to talk about?")
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1995Sun, 13 Nov 2011 04:35:10 +0000zeldaSnarly
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1960Wed, 28 Sep 2011 18:40:11 +0100zelda I do not know about you, but, my life has been full of demands for perfection. Well, I am not perfect, shish, the good God did not make us that way and the Aliens did not seem too hot at it either. So then why do we have to be perfect. Not talking about this place but many places. It is a new world and my generation has certainly slugged loved and smoked and doped itself into embarrasement...well not just my generation and not me so personally, but it certainly is out there... So. I am throwing perfection into my mother's garbage can, telling all the psycho-pervs in my life to <drop themselves> cause I am SNARLY!
I went to a book signing in the big city last night. I was in a bad mood. I was with my lovely cousin and her mother-in-law who were oh so tolerant! I did not smile, I rolled my eyes, I butted in front of people, and complained about the seats till we got new ones. I sat down put my head on my hand and read my email. As this beautiful author discussed his book far up on stage, I had a running conversation with myself, wiggled in the seat, I shook my foot and was generally not myself. I was SNARLY. No one knew me, I didn't bother anyone and I really feel good about this accomplishment. So Twats and Twatlets. Does anyone feel SNARLY? Not b*tchy or witchy...just snarly?]]>
Spanking new Academy Awards
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2034Fri, 06 Jan 2012 07:19:04 +0000zeldaA Bone
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1909Tue, 16 Aug 2011 10:19:33 +0100zelda
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2032Mon, 02 Jan 2012 00:29:39 +0000The Inquisitor I hear you're coming back to police the site (or nuke it). Either way, I would like to request a change of name. I started here because I was a Monty Python fan and thought a 'name' from my favorite bit would be cute. I understand now that this is more than Python. More than the wonderful lifetime of enjoyment I've gotten from the British crew. I have progressed beyond that. I would like to formally request my name be changed to 'Ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-pikang-zoop-boing-goodem-zoo-owli-zhiv'.
Yours Truly Lewis]]>
Welcome Back, Dear Forum!!!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1849Tue, 05 Jul 2011 13:22:08 +0100Naughty Opossum
We need to have a PARTY!!!!!!
I'll bring the bloooonnssssss]]>
Eva Cassidy - Fields of Gold
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2044Sat, 28 Jan 2012 02:23:45 +0000thumble I am not usually given to sentimentalism, and I'm sure everyone here has heard the bittersweet story of probably the most amazing songbird of all time.
Eva Cassidy, a singer from the Washington area in the early 90's, who died in relative obscurity in the prime of her life, and was discovered years later by a British DJ (Terry Wogan), had a hauntingly beautiful voice. She wrote none of her own songs - just interpreted the songs of others that she chose according to her own discriminating tastes. I just shared this particular track with my lovely daughters, so I thought I'd share it with you guys too.
Here is the URL of the Youtube video (sorry guys, I still don't know how to link it), and following are the gorgeous lyrics.
I saw Sting perform this three years ago, and loved the song. I heard Eva sing it a few days ago, and it left me helpless....
You'll remember me when the west wind moves Upon the fields of barley You'll forget the sun in his jealous sky As we walk in fields of gold So she took her love for to gaze awhile Upon the fields of barley In his arms she fell as her hair came down Among the fields of gold
Will you stay with me, will you be my love Among the fields of barley? We'll forget the sun in his jealous sky As we lie in fields of gold See the west wind move like a lover so Upon the fields of barley Feel her body rise when you kiss her mouth Among the fields of gold
I never made promises lightly And there have been some that I've broken But I swear in the days still left We'll walk in fields of gold We'll walk in fields of gold
Many years have passed since those summer days Among the fields of barley See the children run as the sun goes down Among the fields of gold You'll remember me when the west wind moves Upon the fields of barley You can tell the sun in his jealous sky When we walked in fields of gold When we walked in fields of gold When we walked in fields of gold
Never mind...NO NEW FORUM :-(
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2038Tue, 17 Jan 2012 16:47:41 +0000mrsthing So....
As you were.
UPDATE, 20 January: Feeling better now. I know it's probably not John's or Garry's fault; they may have legitimate reasons for not going ahead with a new forum right now. I just couldn't work around my disappointment the other day. Sorry guys.]]>
Congratulations Mr Potato head.
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1966Sun, 09 Oct 2011 22:06:37 +0100englishcad
Uncanny!! Remember kids just say no to plastic surgery...]]>
Am I in love?
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1731Tue, 29 Mar 2011 22:58:46 +0100CPDollyI must be in love]]>
Where Is MrsThing?
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1988Thu, 03 Nov 2011 23:16:30 +0000msfannytwinkle-butt
Your friend, Fanny. PS: Do you want me to send you some spam? I don't know how expensive it is, but I'm willing to buy a can and send it SOS (Send Our Spam), promptly, if needed. Love, Fanny. PSPS: I know I kidded around about the snow, but I truly hope you are not having a bad time and I'm sorry that it snowed, because your town hasn't been thawed out too long from last Spring. But don't worry, the tornado clouds appeared today where I am, and so, whatever just end this letter for me because I'm just no good with letters. I get bored with what I am writing. Sincerely, Fanny. PSPSPS: If you are not bored with this letter by now, then u know that eye am learning how-2 text. I would prefer palindromes to this. Thoughtfully, Fanny.]]>
We Will NOT Have Admins Soon!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1997Mon, 14 Nov 2011 23:36:16 +0000mrsthing When the forum goes over to the new site (I don't think that transition is complete yet), we will have one or more admins. It will be nice to have some new members finally able to join us. And someone to break up the fights.]]>
The Forum Book, 2nd edition, is here!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1956Tue, 27 Sep 2011 19:25:03 +0100mrsthing RIGHT HERE. This is the full-color hard copy version, $39.90.
And the $15.50 black and white hard copy version is HERE
US Postal service 8-20 days $3.99 UPS Ground 5-10 days $8.99 Expedited 5-7 days $16.99 Express 4-6 daya $36.99
Those times include the 3-5 day order processing time that PRECEDES the shipping time. If you order today, it will take 3-5 days for Lulu to process the order, and the rest of the time is shipping.
Everyone needs to thank Possum PROFUSELY for all her hard work. Check out the preview--lots of attention to detail, the artwork is great, I was ROFLMAO just from the first 8 pages! I've already ordered 3 copies: one for John, one for Garry, and one for myself. It won't get to him in time for his birthday, but he will get it in November, so we've shaved 5 months off our previous belatedness.]]>
Nobody Told Me!!!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1954Tue, 27 Sep 2011 01:19:38 +0100thumble But no! Not a sausage. Bugger all. Denied even the whiff of a sniff. (Snort!) Thanks a bloody lot, my so-called ex-friends.
Aaah, that's much better. How's everyone doing?]]>
The Farting Old John Cleese Forum
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2033Tue, 03 Jan 2012 23:44:27 +0000thumble Any other ideas? The winner gets to carve it into the carcass before we drive stake through it.
Am I being too harsh? Would a simple funeral pyre suffice?]]>
Grand Opening of Lewis' Pub
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1419Thu, 17 Jun 2010 01:26:41 +0100The Inquisitorieldtodsh
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1976Tue, 25 Oct 2011 21:55:38 +0100Lozzykinz yeah, right...
sounds like someone has vomited his name up.]]>
Welcome here Ntuianetwo!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1982Wed, 26 Oct 2011 23:31:05 +0100chris14B E W A R E!!!
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=1597Thu, 30 Sep 2010 01:22:03 +0100mrsthing
Beware of men who are overly fond of cats. Beware of birds that fly into your house and perch on your bed post. Beware of skinny chefs. Beware of men with heart-shaped faces. Beware of grifting bear geeks.]]>
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=2021Fri, 09 Dec 2011 01:25:36 +0000thumble I realized what biggy-boy meant was "any woman would suffice"....to receive the benefit of his manhood.
So how about a little analysis of the usage of this most powerful verb?
If, like me, one assumes that in the majority of cases, "to do" means "to fuck", what does this mean for society?
For example, if one is being introduced to the Queen, would one say "Your Majesty, how fuck you fuck? One would likely not be amused, but too doing bad.
Any other thoughts? I have many. I will fuck my best.]]>
The Forum Joke Book
http://www.cleeseblog.com/Vanilla/comments.php?DiscussionID=99Fri, 01 Aug 2008 15:03:03 +0100mrsthing The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, 'Hello.'
'Mrs. Sanders, please.'
'Mrs. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint Agnes Laboratory. When your doctor sent your husband's biopsy to the lab yesterday, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well, and we are now uncertain which one is your husband's. Frankly the results are either bad or terrible.'
'What do you mean?' Mrs. Sanders asks nervously.
'Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for AIDS. We can't tell which is your husband's.'
'That's dreadful! Can't you do the test again?' questioned Mrs. Sanders.
'Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay for these expensive tests one time.'
'Well, what am I supposed to do now?'
'The people at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him.]]>